Which Wolf are you Feeding

LIFE LEADERSHIP DIGEST – Article by Steve Trivett

There is an old parable that suggests we have two wolves inside us which are always at war with each other. One is the good wolf that is kind, ambitious, brave and curious. The other is the bad wolf, more fearful, anxious, resentful and angry. The message is that we become the one we feed moment to moment.

We can observe which emotional “wolf” we are feeding by observing our way of being, our speech, body movement and mood state. For example, we can observe eight basic moods that give structure to how we lead our lives. For example,  our “good wolf” accepts that facts have to be faced if we are not to be stuck for ideas or frozen by uncertainty.

Observing your Way of Being

In the diagram below, you can see the implications of accepting, or not accepting, four common constraints that get in the way of you being more effective in the way you lead your life. Namely, our innate capacity to face facts, explore possibilities, embrace uncertainty and seek growth. They are explored in more detail in the Mood Manager Guides.

Based on the work of Alan Sieler at the Newfield Institute. Listen to Alan explain Why Moods Matter in Leadership

When the possibility for change cannot be seen or accepted, the emotions of anger and frustration can dominate and produce a mood of resentment. You cannot then find peace of mind or clarity of thought. This easily happens when you refuse to accept the facts of your situation.

May the Best “Wolf” Win

The “bad wolf” tends to waste a lot of energy in not-accepting even the possibility that things can be different from what you are experiencing. This generates feelings of pessimism, resentment, anxiety and frustration, that makes them distrustful, confused and angry.

The “good wolf” tends to experience greater clarity of thought because their mind is at peace and open to alternative ways of seeing things, even wondering what they could do to react more optimistically. This generates ambition, curiosity and opportunities for personal growth and learning.

So you have to learn how to observe your moods and how you can manage them to serve your best interests. This means being able to notice, name and navigate eight basic emotional states (see below) that will compete with each other for your attention. It’s amazing how quickly you can move from a mood of confidence and motivation to feeling insecure and resigned.

Negative emotions can hold you back from being your best self and realising your full potential.

Listen to Sadhguru talking about conquering negative emotions.

Consider the possibility that you live in the feeling of your thinking, not the feelings generated by your circumstances. What does this suggest to you?

For example, when you are aware of a feeling entering your body, reflect on the thoughts that could have generated it. What would happen if you thought differently?

• What if you saw threats and fears as a stimulant for positive action or constructive criticism Could it be an opportunity for deeper reflection and learning? 
• Ask yourself this question and write down all the thoughts that come to mind. If you had 5% less fear of the unknown you would be able to  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
• If you were to see your mind as a place that holds infinite possibilities, a place where your imagination and creativity could flow freely in a positive, peaceful and clear mental state,  in what way would you be able to perform as your “good wolf”?