As we make our way through life, we connect with things and people we care about. We also hold on to important concerns. These concerns shape what is important and meaningful to us and determine our choices and actions.
How we interpret our assumptions and what triggers our reactions also reflects our concerns and what we care about. When we are treated badly by others, we assume that it was their intention, as they were triggered by our concerns. But often, we just react to our concerns without thinking. We get angry, keep quiet, or conceal our feelings and become resentful.
The Neuroscientist David Rock, suggests that we share common concerns. They are reflected in Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, with feeling safe as a core concern. While sometimes we prefer to move away from danger, at other times, we will stand up and fight. David observes from his research that when we feel safe, there are concerns that we all share.
This provides valuable insight for leaders and coaches. In my work as a Change Consultant, I used the “moving away” and “moving towards” approaches to understanding what might be driving a desire for change and the reasons for resistance.
David Rock identifies five core concerns, which are known as his SCARF Model. It is useful for determining the client’s predispositions when deciding how to collaborate with and influence others to get their commitment to act.
It is useful when negotiating and deciding when to approach and what to avoid. Most people react negatively to a loss of status and see a positive impact as a gain, such as having more money, perks, authority, and security for the family. A loss of status might threaten one’s income, influence, or loss of friends.
For example:
STATUS gives us feelings of self-worth and social importance compared to others.
CERTAINTY gives us the confidence to plan for a better future and tests how we react when the plans break down.
AUTONOMY gives us a sense of control and influence constrained by our level of authority.
RELATEDNESS gives us a sense of safety and trust when dealing with those who know us or fear being let down.
FAIRNESS expects us to be treated the same or differently according to our needs.